How to Have Hard Conversations Without Burning Bridges
Here’s the truth: If you lead people, you will have hard conversations.
There’s no way around it… and honestly, there shouldn’t be.
Whether it’s navigating team conflict, giving feedback that’s tough to hear, or calling out behaviour that doesn’t align with your practice’s values, these moments aren’t a sign that something’s wrong. They’re a sign that you’re leading.
The real question isn’t how to avoid hard conversations… it’s how to have them in a way that strengthens trust instead of breaking it?
Here’s how we approach it:
1. Start From Respect, Not Reaction
Before you step into any tough conversation, check your energy.
Are you grounded? Or are you reacting?
When you lead from reaction, frustration, anger, resentment… your tone shifts, your words get sharper, and the bridge you’re trying to build starts cracking before you even begin.
Take a beat. Start from respect. The goal isn't to “win.” It’s to understand, align, and move forward.
2. Be Clear and Be Kind
Hard conversations don’t have to be harsh. But they do have to be clear.
It’s not respectful to dance around an issue and hope the other person picks up what you’re hinting at. Say what needs to be said, honestly, directly, and without unnecessary blame or shame.
"Here’s what I’m noticing. Here’s why it matters. Here’s what needs to change."
Clarity is kindness. Vagueness is confusing and usually ends in resentment on both sides.
3. Focus on the Future, Not Just the Fault
You’re not here to rehash every mistake. You’re here to move forward.
Frame the conversation around where you’re going:
What’s the standard you expect?
What are the next steps?
How will you support them in getting there?
Leadership isn’t about pointing fingers. It’s about building a path.
4. Own Your Part
If the situation has been brewing for a while, it’s fair to ask yourself:
Have I been clear enough about expectations before now?
Have I provided the feedback or support needed?
Have I modelled the values I’m asking others to live up to?
Owning your part (without downplaying what needs to be addressed) models the kind of leadership that builds loyalty, not defensiveness.
5. Know That Discomfort Isn’t a Sign You’re Doing It Wrong
If it feels uncomfortable, you’re not failing. You’re doing the work real leaders do.
Growth comes with tension. Accountability comes with vulnerability. Connection comes with honest communication… not just the easy kind.
You can be firm AND kind.
You can hold people accountable AND believe in their potential.
You can have hard conversations AND walk away with stronger trust than you had before.
You’re not just building a business, you’re building a culture!
The way you handle hard conversations defines your leadership far more than the way you handle easy ones. Strong practices, healthy teams, and thriving businesses are built on real conversations, even when they’re hard, especially when they’re hard.
Lead with courage.
Lead with clarity.
Lead with heart.
Your team, and your future, are worth it.
If you want more support navigating leadership conversations inside your practice, we’re here.
Let’s make your next tough conversation a turning point, not a breaking point.